IECRC (USA & Canada)

Issue # 13
May 25, 2008 / Jamadul Awwal 1429

As a trainer and facilitator in the intercultural field, a common way that I engage the interest of audience members is by asking for their own examples and stories that are relevant to the topic at hand.  At a recent group facilitation session I was leading, a female supervisor had shared a situation where she had found another female from a culture different from hers, praying in the stairwell of her company’s back hallway.  Concerned for her employee’s safety since she was in a darkly lit back exit area, and unaware at the time of the implications of her suggestion at the time, the supervisor kindly asked her to move into another room, offering her own office space, as an accommodation.  The employee agreed, but the next day – was found in the same place, performing her prayers.  Why did this happen?

For people who may be aware of this particular culture’s customs – seeing someone pray in a public, open space would be perfectly acceptable. But, for this supervisor – and for many individuals in leadership roles – exposure to such traditions different from their own, causes a misunderstanding of the situation.  Unfortunately, these misunderstandings can add up, possibly causing a strained relationship, and perhaps even graver consequences.  So, what can we do in these situations? 

Recently, there was an unfortunate and serious case in my community of a lawsuit that occurred from a company leader who did not understand the indirect communication style of his Asian employees.  My initial reaction to this scenario was sadness – knowing that this outcome could have been prevented by having cultural awareness through a basic understanding of the cultures and approaches of those in your daily life.

As a person who has been brought up with understandings of faith, I am in the humble yet critical position of being able to explain the concepts of religious practice from my own personal experience to my workshop attendees.  The benefit of my role as facilitator is that I am able to safely introduce ideas and understandings that may possibly conflict with others, and yet – I am still seen in an expert role.  Despite all of this, a challenge I face that is common with many others who follow a spiritual path is to be able to express, explain – and even justify, in some cases – to others, my choice of behaviors and beliefs on an everyday basis.  Many a time, the less difficult approach to take would be to avoid the topic all together.  But then – how much understanding can come from a lack of dialogue and attention?

Discussing matters of faith is no easy feat – public school systems in many countries ensure that teachers avoid the topic of religion in order not to offend the parents and children within their institutions.  The disadvantage of this approach is that rather than having an equal, even forum for research and discussion in a classroom – children are exposed to biased and incomplete versions of commentary on faith-based behavior and practice.  Growing up, these misguided opinions may turn into anxiety, prejudices, and avoidance of the “other”.  All in all, the potential of the person and anyone whom she or he comes in contact with, would be at a loss.

To address the issues and questions above, here are some recommendations for increasing intercultural awareness about your own religious practice:

Recognize the intention of the person asking questions.  Many times – what may be perceived as offensive or ignorant questions are actually earnest attempts to understand you and your practice of faith.  Of course, be aware that the approaches of others can be negative, but – be a detective and discern these individuals from those who have good intent.

Be open to expressing your understanding of faith through analogy.  Faith-based experiences can sometimes best be explained through analogy to others’ experiences, commonly-known stories, and the other person’s vocabulary and expressions.  Rather than trying to find difference, establish similarities amongst the approaches and how each is effective.

Choose the appropriate time to explain.  Sometimes, reacting within a highly emotional situation may only cause more difficulty. However, not facing a said misconception of your faith by another person may make it difficult for you to prevent misunderstanding later.  Rather than either of these options, it would be wise to choose an appropriate time and be purposeful in discussing your point of view, to clarify the misconception and have a “teachable moment.”

Share.  Many a time, our colleagues and friends are curious and would like to learn more, but are polite and may not want to feel they are intruding by asking.  Instead, begin the conversation yourself about a community event, family gathering, or experiences that you had, and you will then be able to share more ideas develop understanding of your faith, with them.

Realize the cost or benefit within a situation.  In some instances – it is simply better not to engage in a discussion about matters of faith, especially if you know it may harm you, your family, or your working relationship.  Seek guidance from others as to how to approach the issue, and decide if you want to remain in that situation or take yourself out from it.  Know that this is a reasonable course of action and that there will be other opportunities for others’ learning later on.

It is my hope that by bringing forth this discussion about personal religious practice and practical methods of how to help create awareness, that community members will be able to safely, confidently, and peacefully achieve the understanding of faith by others in their lives.

Farzana Nayani

Ms. Farzana Nayani is Education and Training Consultant for the University of British Columbia Center for Intercultural Communication. She is reachable at farzana.nayani@gmail.com.